I am pleased to announce the launch of a new and exciting range of products-The Let's Garden Gnomes.Inspired by that quaint Japanese preoccupation of adding 'let's' to a noun and hoping the world understands.Do you have a special person in your life,someone whose sanctimonious smile you'd love to literally blow off their faces?Your boss,..your husband,..a neighbour.....mother-in-law or father-in-law,..a friend who has done you ill???If so please send us a recent photo and we will make your dreams come true.Our artists can produce incredibly lifelike replicas of that vexing personage.Satisfaction guaranteed!!!!
Also,we are pleased to announce our latest talking models.Provide a sample of
the relevant person's voice and we can program the gnome to say a final few words
before detonation.Examples are "I'm so sorry.You were a fantastic DIL.Please
don't kill me"(Mother-in-law model 3245889), "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you I loved you when you rang
me at work"(Husband model 678231) "If you let me live,I promise I won't say shouganai
ever again"(applicable to several types of models).We also have a model which,if you
wish,can commit seppuku(lifelike blood and guts can be added for an extra fee)
just before you gleefully press that button.Choose from our hundreds of delightful
little models just waiting for you to come along and blow their little brains out!!
For those of you who can foresee the need to let off steam on a regular basis
we provide a credit free payment plan which can be extended for upto 25 years.
Whatever your needs,wherever you are,whoever you are,let us take care of you!!
All gnomes are fitted with remote control detonation devices and tested
according to the S and T.B.K standards.
A free catalogue will be available soon for your leisurely perusal or if you wish to visit our website for a graphic demo.(Sorry currently under construction)
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